Tuesday night we had dinner with a couple and we got to talking about a myriad of things ranging from college pranks and well back to college pranks. at one point though we were talking about extroverts vs introverts and where we fall on the scale. i typically described my self as shy but have never understood why because i have lots to say and an intense desire to be known.
i have always loved being asked questions and i am beginning to realize why. it's the assurance that the person asking really wants an answer and more importantly has allotted time in their life to hear it (although i try to get my answer out in ten words or less).
i have this weird unaccounted for fear that while i am pouring my heart out someone will just get up and walk away. i guess it's the fear of rejection or being misunderstood?
i don't know why being misunderstood sounds like death to me but it does. what's so funny though is that i often feel misunderstood cause i don't just come out with what i am thinking! catch 22. (can we say FOM!)
so i've realized that like questions i do even better if the conversation time is mapped out. for example: a car ride, over dinner, ect. things where i know ok i have "X" amount of time to talk. loco, i know.
but if there is no set amount of time to talk then i assume the other person has things to do and is really just interested in sharing a polite nod and then being on there way. so when ever i run into people or in situations where i am forced to mingle (ie: most of life) i find myself trying to end conversations to save the other person the awkwardness of having to end it themselves!
so this brings me to why i love my blog. i feel like i have a little slot of time to share my thoughts. although i do worry keeping it short cause i know most people have probably trailed off... by now!
so there you go. if you have ever though i seem rude cause i say hello and then do an about face this is partly why! sheesh.
please hand me a blue chip
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6 comments:
This is fantastic. I'm sorry you created this as a "draft" and left it there for a week. :) You should have posted it along time ago. I assume this is what Natasha was reading on Friday night. :) Thanks for your honesty. :)
love you lauren! we've got lots in common.
I love that you put "FOM." I had to think for a while to figure it out. You are the best. I was just thinking this today, but if you hadn't gotten married when your lease was up, I totally would have lived with you!! think how much amazing sleep we would have had.
Lauren, I love you. Remember how I stalked you in the beginning of our small group just so I could be your friend. I am glad we are friends!!
TAG! You're it...
You're too funny, Lauren. Thanks for sharing! I found you through Nat's blog. Did you go to high school at SG? I think we've had this conversation....I'm forgetful!
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