Lately: January 2008

I am sure many of you have read or heard of the story of the prodigal son. If by chance you haven’t read it the story is in Luke 15:11-32. Read it or this blog will make no sense. Every time I have heard this story I have always felt bad for the older son. (Which is weird because if I should be able to relate to anyone in the story it’s the younger, screw up brother. I have a sweet and beautiful older sister that was pretty obedient to our parents and never seemed to get in nears as much trouble as I did! But for some reason I always read this story and found myself taking sides with the older brother against the father.) Yes, why ARE you rewarding the younger when it’s the OLDER that has been so obedient? Where IS the sense of Justice?!!

But I always shoved this out of my mind and tried to take from the story what I thought I was supposed to take; that we are all prodigal sons and should be thankful for the forgiveness offered and move on to the next parable.

Well while reading my “Anger” book Jones talks about this parable and says something that I had never really picked up on. Jones looks deeper into the exchange between the older son and the father and I was amazed at what I had been missing. He describes the older brother’s anger as ‘sinful concealing’ opposite from ‘ sinful revealing’. (Sinful revealing is those of us that get angry and explode at others, sinful concealing is those of us that turn inward and withdraw from others.) He describes the older brother this way because in his anger about his younger brother’s warm welcome, he refuses to go into the party. “He did not blow up; he simply withdrew and clamed up. The father, however, did not." Which is interesting but what really got me was the kindness of the father next to the anger of the older son which i had never really seen as wrong. "The father wisely approached his son to initiate conversation and draw out his thoughts. He exposed the man’s resentment toward his father and jealousy toward his brother.”

This may seem small but I had never seen it like that! I had never seen the tenderness of the father reaching out to his first son! So, this lead me to reread the story in Luke and I was again amazed at another big chunk I had been missing.

So the son responds to his father’s initiation by arguing, “All these many years I have served you. I have always obeyed what you said. But you never gave me a young goat so I could have a supper and a good time with my friends. But as soon as this son of yours came back, you killed the fat calf. And yet he wasted your money with bad women."
This is where I usually would say to myself, “Yes! What do you say to that?!” But this time I really understood the father’s response. “My son, you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. But we had to celebrate and be glad because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.”

Somehow I had always ignored the first sentence, “My son you are always with me.” Not that the father was saying, 'Big deal about you! You are hear all the time.' But he was saying, 'YOU are always with ME. You always have my presence! I am always here, you are always with me!' Isn’t that what we really want?!

On top of that he says, “All I have is yours!” Second to giving him his presence he gives his son all that he has! It's like the father is saying, 'a calf and a party? That's all you want?! But you are with me!? This is all yours!'

How much like the older brother am I that I didn’t hear the father correctly either! So natural it is for me to complain, demand, compare and condemn. Oh, how I want to realize the depth of those words, “My daughter you are always with me” and realize I have everything that I need.

I never knew how much the story of the prodigal son was really about the father.